Bernard at Play

Bernard at Play
Bernard laid bare
Bernard jokes
pesky IT

Health warning: Bernard can damage your sense and sensibilities. To continue will constitute full acceptance of all liability and complete acceptance that no claim or complaint can be made against any person howsoever connected with the site.

Bernard would like to share the following quotes with you. None are capable of belief and, unfortunately, he seems to think he should think of some more and add them whenever it suits him. We cannot stop him but feel free to email him with other suggestions as this may be the only way to beat him.

"I am just popping out for a little walk dear" - Mao Tse Tung to Mrs Mao**
"Either those elephants go, or I go" - Mrs Hannibal
"so, who saw me; they must be lying; it wasn't me; I could not have done it, I don't own an axe; it kept eyeballing me so what was I supposed to do; anyway it spoilt the view and it was an accident I was just resting my axe there while I relieved myself." - George Washington (before he spoke to his lawyer).
"Minutes? I never said minutes. Why can't you listen to me properly?" - A. Blair

** (ed. if you really want to see some of Mao's quotes click here.)